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My Busy Day (by Martha H.)

When my Mummy went back to work I realised that I too would have to get a job. The trouble was that I didn't have a lot of experience in the working world so I had to play to my strengths. There was one area where I knew I excelled and that was making old people happy and luckily, I know quite a few elderly folk so it made perfect sense to go out a couple of days a week and entertain the oldies. Thursday is Nellybert day. Nellybert to you that is. To me they are Granny Mary and Granda Bert. Today was hectic for I had an extra oldie to contend with as Auntie Hannah was there too. First thing on the agenda was to get all happed up and check on the outside world.
Those pigs are doing well. To tell you the truth I'm a wee bit apprehensive around them for they are rough. They always assume you've food on you and would walk through you to get at it. Still as long as they don't think I'm the food I'll be doing all right.

I've my wellies on and my snowsuit and the garden looks lovely and all but if Aunt Hannah thinks I'm tramping through it she can think again. Snow's nearly up to the top of my boots. It's like walking on the moon. Think I'll just sit here on this log.


Yes. I like this log.

I found this brush in the kitchen drawer. Just the job for grooming Fred.

I like Fred better than Holly. So I'll cuddle him.

Lunch time. I feed myself mostly but it pleases the old people to let them help. That is Aunt Hannah steadying my bowl of Popeye Pasta. Yum. My mummy is a wonderful cook.

Those bears never get a walk unless I take them. I expect Granny thinks she's got better things to do. But I care, even if she doesn't.

I like hats. If it pleases Granny to take pictures of me trying on new hats that's OK with me.

Then I have to feed Judy. It's pretend food but she likes it.

Granny looked a bit flat towards the end of the day. Thought a bit of art would liven us both up. She's got a lot to learn and I'm going to teach her.
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Happy Birthday Katy


Katy through the years.
Happy Birthday darling.
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Foddering

Bert puts in a time of it looking after the 'bastes'. He has all Clint's to do these evenings for Clint is out driving milk tankers 'til all hours.

He has to fodder the kune kunes and the hens and then there are the three dogs and two cats to feed too.

Then he goes down to Clint's and feeds and puts in 16 geese and 30 turkeys. Clint's dog Lucy helps him to get the fowl in. She is very good at it. He then has to feed Lucy, two goats and four young cattle.

After all that he has to go back home and feed Pearlie and then he feeds us. Tonight we had carry out from the new and rather excellent Indian takeaway in Cullybackey.

Last night at Clint's he was missing one of the Hereford heifers. After a long tramp he found her in a faraway field keeping company with a young bull. She refused to leave her new lover. The bovine equivalent of the morning after pill will be needed.

Bert said to me,

How long do you think I'd have to stand in the middle of a snowy field before some young thing would crash through six fences to get at me?


A long time Bert. A very long time.
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Disruption

Travelled home tonight at 30mph on the A26, 10mph in town and village and 15mph on the road to Cullybackey. Before that I got layered in the snow at Matty's and had to be helped out by Cousin John and Brother Joe. London Sister can't get back to London and Kerry Sister wrecked her car trying to get to Matty's.

Ain't snow pretty?

Meanwhile Matty is quite poorly with a kidney infection and cannot get out of bed. And she only got one visit from the carers today instead of the four she's supposed to get. Pearlie just got one visit too.

Ain't snow pretty?
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All The Fun Of The Snow


All last week I was late for work. No matter what time I left I was still late. I could have left at a time, say 7am-7:30am, that would have got me in on time but then I'd have been really early and that would have been even more time to freeze my ass off in our not fit for purpose office. We're moving to a new one soon but it'll be a week or so yet. So I was late Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. No one said anything. I spent a lot of time at Matty's too and each evening I was getting home late. I'm behind with everything at home.

On Thursday morning it took me 40 minutes to drive from home to Zoe's to pick up Miss Martha. It usually takes around 15 minutes. We spent the morning at home and the afternoon at Matty's. I left Miss Martha and Miss Hannah home, spent a couple of hours at home then drove out to Matty's on Thursday evening. I was there until 7pm last night.

Then I had a pleasant evening at home with Bert. We tried the new Indian takeaway in Cullybackey which I'd recommend. That and a couple of bottles of wine put the evening in nicely. This morning I had a long lie in, then got up, had breakfast, updated my Wordscraper and Lexulous games, did some washing and took the pigs for a walk up the back lane.

I'm waiting now for the call back to Matty's. Kerry Sister set off from West of Dingle this morning, hit black ice three miles from home and put her car off the road. It's unlikely she'll make it to Matty's today. Must go now and have a shower and see if I can find some clean clothes to wear.

It's been quite a week. A fine week to find out on Monday that some dirty, rotten bastard used my debit card to treat themselves to 490 quid's worth of goods at Asda Direct. I wonder what they bought?
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A Reply From Wendy Scudamore

Remember the man from Fermanagh who wanted to buy my Lily as a Christmas present for his son, the man who said Wendy Scudamore 'let him down.' Well it seems it was the other way around. This is what Wendy has to say.

(Man from Fermanagh) rang me weeks ago and wanted two piglets. the second piglet will not be weaned until early January so when he said he wanted them for Christmas I told him it wasn't possible to get them to him in time. He then wanted me to forget the second piglet and bring just the one but I told him I couldn't possibly travel the one piglet all that way on its own - too stressful and it would have no company when it got there.

I am pretty angry actually as I have another customer in N Ireland waiting for her pigs in Jan and I was splitting the travel cost between them . i cannot at this late stage let the lady down so I will probably have to shoulder half the cost of the journey myself - more than the profit from the pigs.

If you know anyone else in N Ireland who wants any, the journey cost is £300 and I have some super little breeding piglets for sale,

Best Wishes
Wendy
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The Return of the Scunging Devil Dogs

Paddy and Judy disappeared today. The call of the snowy wood proved too hard to ignore. Dogs love snow because it intensifies smells and smell is how dogs experience the world.

They were only gone ten minutes but that was long enough to worry Bert. And it worried me too. I don't think I could bear another pair of scunging devil dogs.

We said to Paddy,

Paddy. How could you do this? At your time of life?


He looked at us sadly from his favourite spot on the leather sofa. We said,

Paddy. How can you do this to us? At our time of life?


He sighed, tucked his head between his paws and paid us not a bit of mind. I hope it was a one-off.

"scunge"

Ulster-Scots

Meaning:

to explore; wander about in the countryside

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